Daily Answer Desk

I have tried twice to move out of state with my kids since the divorce in 2001. The judge said no both times and now I want to try again. I want to improve the quality of my children’s life and have their best interest in mind. Does the court/law have the power to do this? It doesn't seem fair. – Beth

Answer:

Beth: Children relocation cases are really custody cases. The court does not have the power to keep you from moving. But the court does have the power to change custody to the non-relocating parent if it finds that is in the best interests of the children.

What is a limited divorce? – Tom

Answer:

Tom: Let’s say you do not have grounds for an absolute divorce. But you still need to get in front of a judge for an order with respect to visitation or alimony or child support. Most jurisdictions have a way to do that based on easier grounds than those for an absolute divorce. For example, in Maryland the proceeding is called a limited divorce. In DC it is a legal separation. And in Virginia it is a divorce a mensa et thoro (divorce from bed and board).

in my final decree i have a geographical restriction of my county and “contiguous counties”. what does that mean exactly? my ex-wife is trying to move 2over1up. – Jeff

Answer:

Jeff: Contiguous counties means counties that share a border with your county.

If my husband and i filed for divorce, if we were to begin to see each other, is a divorce like a marriage in that it can be annuled? – Mechelle

Answer:

Mechelle: If the court has not ruled on your divorce, then you can withdraw the complaint or ask the court to dismiss it.

All my divorce papers have been signed by a judge and they got returned to me the papers state that the divorce is final on the same date as the judge signed them but it has a statement (forthwith). What does (forthwith) mean? Is it the cooling off period and if so how long? – Joseph

Answer:

Joseph: Forthwith means at once or immediately. However, there is usually an appeal period, if not waived, for any court order.

What does “absolute divorce” mean? – Tina

Answer:

Tina: An absolute divorce is the termination of a marriage. It is a final divorce as contrasted with a legal separation or limited divorce.

My husband and I recently came to a settlement about our divorce and custody issues. Now we are talking about a reconciliation, how long are the papers valid for without being signed? – Andrea

Answer:

Andrea: You have it a little backwards. The papers are not valid at all until and unless they are signed.

I am trying to fill out a waiver of service and appearance form. The first sentence reads as follows, “Before me, the undersigned notary public, personally appeared [blank]and upon being placed under oath, swore to the truth of the following statements.” Can you tell me what goes in that blank pls? – Matthew

Answer:

Matthew: Your name.

My husband and I have a separation agreement we are both responsible for the joint debt. However my husband borrowed a lot of money that is unaccounted for and these loans were not addressed in the separation. He is now insisting that when we sell the house all his debt be paid first before dividing the money in half. Can he do that even though the separation order specifically lists which bills can be paid from the proceeds of the house. Under what circumstances can the terms of a separation agreement be changed? -- Tondi

Answer:

Tondi: A separation agreement can only be changed by a new writing signed by both parties. A court order can only be changed by a new court order.

Do the courts penalize the person who files for the divorce? – Ginger

Answer:

Ginger: No. As long as you have grounds and meet the residency and jurisdiction requirements, you have a legal right to file for divorce, and it will not be held against you.

My wife had an affair with the another man. I am still married to her. Can I get alimony from her and anything from him? – Ted

Answer:

Ted: While fault is a factor in alimony, so is ability to support yourself, and I have found it next to impossible for a man to get alimony. The old “alienation of affection” cause of action no longer exists so you cannot recover anything from the other man.

Hi I have moved out a month ago and my wife said she would sign the separation papers but still wont sign them. What can I do to start the proceedings on being separated without her signing? She wont sign until she gets what she wants (more money) which I cant give in anymore then what I have. So can I get a separation without her signing? - LIM

Answer:

LIM: If you mean how do you start the period of physical separation before you can file a complaint for divorce, you did it when you moved out.

My husband and I filed for D and we are living separately. On the papers he stated the date of separation as the last time we saw each other. If we spend time together away from home (he's coming for a family event), does that "reset the clock" for the date of separation? What if we sleep together? – B

Answer:

B: Spending time together may not reset the clock but sleeping together will.

My husband and I have lived seperatley for about 10 years. Neither have filed for a divorce. The woman now living with him is using his/our last name. Is there anyway I can stop her from using his last name while he is still married to me? – Elizabeth

Answer:

Elizabeth: No, people can use whatever name they want as long as it is not to defraud creditors or for any illegal purpose.

After almost forty and a half years of marriage, my husband wants a divorce. He just retired in 2003 and after working for a newspaper company for almost forty years. Question is, do we start with a dissolution for separation or divorce? He wants to do the divorce without a lawyer! – Mary

Answer:

Mary: Start with a Separation Agreement.

my husband and i agreed on divorce and have everything figured out about property and such but we dont need a lawyer. Is there a way to get the paperwork and deliver it to a judge without a lawyer? everything is settled we just want it over with. – Stacey

Answer:

Stacey: You are not required to have a lawyer. But divorce is a legal procedure and there are rules for how the paperwork is prepared and delivered to the judge. So you will have to research this and follow the correct procedures.

Having endured an abusive relationship for 5 files, i left. Filed a divorce after 8 years, he never shows up, the lawyers keep telling me stories. I went several times without the court hearing the case. Frustrated, l decided to use affidavit, his lawyer opposed to that. he's with our 3 children & his live-in girlfriend. Being a christain, i need to get start a new relationship through marriage, so i intend going ahead to marry without the divorce decree. what are the consequences of bigamy? – Victoria

Answer:

Victoria: In most states the second marriage would be void and a crime for which you can go to jail.

My Ex-wife wants to have her cake and eat it too. I have joint custody of our 5 yr. old with my ex-wife. She she reminds me from time to time that she is the custodial parent and I am the non-custodial parent....Very annoying. I teach for a living and make good money. But recently she asked a judge to raise the child support and the judge granted it, making it even more difficult to live. I have always wanted my son, even from the beginning of our marital end. My ex, had a contempt for violating my visitation and the same jude that issued it retracted it. I want custody of my son, but how do I have a chance of getting it when a judge does things like this??? If I get a lawyer, can the lawyer get a different judge? – Sick and Tired

Answer:

Sick and Tired: You can ask a judge to recuse himself or herself from a case for bias, but the decision is up to the judge. Most judges do not think they are biased. So you run the risk of an unsuccessful challenge and getting the same judge for the custody hearing who you have now accused of bias.

I'm looking for a sample 'Separation Agreement' form. I was not sure if there is difference state to state? – Frank

Answer:

Frank: I searched for “Sample Separation Agreement” on Google and found several. Each state has its own quirks. And clients have brought samples like these to me that they have filled out wrongly. So, as I say to my clients, don’t sign anything unless you show it to your lawyer first.

TRYING TO LIVE IN THE SAME HOUSE WHILE PROCESSING OUR OWN DIVORCE (LOTS OF ANGER HERE) SUGGESTED GOOD TO DO, I'M AFRAID IF I LEAVE SHE WILL SAY I ABANDONED EVERYTHING. SHE SAYS I HAVE TO PAY MORE TOWARDS THE BILLS BEING I MAKE MORE, IS THIS LEGALLY TRUE? – ML

Answer:

ML: Until there is a court order, it is up to the two of you to decide and agree how the bills will be paid.