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Law Office of J. Mark Weiss P.S. - Divorce Net

Law Office of J. Mark Weiss P.S. - Divorce Net

200 W. Mercer Street, Suite E-410
Seattle, Washington 98119

Phone: 206-622-6707

Divorce Law Blog of J. Mark Weiss

About Us

It is our philosophy to respect every client as an individual, and to provide ethical advice and services that are appropriate to each client's unique situation.

We understand the challenges of divorce, and focus on helping clients achieve long-term solutions that are consistent with their goals and their values. We do that by learning what is most important to the client. We do not provide cookie-cutter answers based on preconceived notions that disregard individual or unique needs. We counsel clients to carefully evaluate whether short-term actions come at the expense of their long-term goals and interests. That focus is enhanced by an exceptional understanding of the law, and knowledge of other relevant principles.

J. Mark Weiss is recognized and respected as a leader in Washington for his expertise in divorce matters in general, and collaborative divorce in particular. He is one of a handful of attorneys in the greater Seattle area who have ended highly successful careers in litigation to become even more successful in non-adversarial dispute resolution. In January 2007, Mark transformed his practice and became a full-time collaborative divorce lawyer and consultant, and mediator, which required obtaining significant additional education (well beyond the required minima) to develop necessary skills.

Mark has taught and written extensively on community property, business, and other family law and divorce issues. He has received numerous honors, including "Attorney of the Year" by the Family Law Section of the Washington State Bar Association in 2005, and "Super Lawyer" by Washington Law and Politics magazine, and the highest possible rating by Avvo. He is a Fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Mark is particularly experienced and skilled in cases involving business and complex property issues, including professional practices. He is also experienced with more complex parenting (custody/visitation) matters.

Family Law and Divorce Options 

Perhaps 50% of couples separate or divorce. Divorce has become a normal reality of life in America. As with other life transitions, you can decide how you will react and manage this change.

The end of a marriage or long-term committed relationship affects all of our relationships. Your choices will affect not only yourself, but also your children, your family, and your friends. It is a transition with important emotional, financial, and legal aspects. Whenever possible, all aspects — emotional, financial, and legal — should be addressed to support your long-term goals, your future, and the future of your children.

It used to be that you went to a lawyer, who would tell you about the law, make legal and factual arguments based on that advice, and conduct adversarial-style negotiations for you. If those negotiations failed, the lawyer would make arguments to a judge, who would make the decision. Although many divorce lawyers may still operate that way, nowadays, there are many more options, so you can pick the divorce process that best suits your situation and preferences.

Collaborative Divorce

Collaborative Divorce provides an experience where clients control the outcome of their divorce in a supported process where specially-trained lawyers provide the structure to reach resolution. In a Collaborative Divorce, the clients' highest goals and interests are in the forefront of consideration and guide the client-created outcome. In other words, divorcing and separating couples arrive at their own resolutions based on the factors that are most important to themselves, perhaps even with lower attorney's fees than adversarial processes. It is a process that preserves (and even sometimes enhances) relationships with former spouses/partners, increasing the likelihood of better co-parenting. Collaborative Divorce is effective and provides a good value to clients by ensuring that their decisions are carefully thought through and in alignment with their goals. It is a process that respects the financial, legal, and emotional parts of a divorce or separation. While not inexpensive, Collaborative Divorce is typically more cost-effective than adversarial representation because spouses receive the support and learn the information necessary to resolve significant disputes without incurring the higher expense (both to pocket books and relationships) of far less efficient adversarial methods. Most importantly, it can provide a divorce of a higher quality (especially with regards to having closure on the past and preparation for the future) than most any other process.

To ensure that the attorneys are fully and solely aligned with the clients' goals of seeking resolution, Collaborative Divorce attorneys are disqualified from representing their clients in court in any adversarial process. As a consequence, the attorneys can only advocate for a settlement that is in alignment with client goals. Because going to court to get a decision is no longer an option, most of the better Collaborative Divorce attorneys invest substantial time and effort to learn new and additional negotiation and settlement skills that truly make them "settlement specialists" to a degree unknown to most adversarial lawyers. The disqualification provision therefore provides significant advantages for those who are seeking to reach a negotiated divorce resolution instead of a litigated one. The primary disadvantage from the disqualification provision is that in the unlikely event the Collaborative Divorce process terminates before a final settlement is reached, then the clients need to retain new attorneys.

The measure of success in Collaborative Divorce cases is achieving a resolution that is as durable as the circumstances will allow. Achieving a durable resolution instead of a temporary cease-fire requires that both parties not only accept the settlement when it is made, but also continue to accept it thereafter. While every divorce, no matter the process, results in binding documents at the end, the goal in a Collaborative Divorce is to reach binding settlement agreements that do not require future enforcement with the courts. Achieving that decree of durability requires a different way of negotiating, and a Collaborative Divorce attorney needs substantial additional training and experience to regularly be able to assist clients who may be interested in that type of outcome so they can do the necessary work to achieve it. A durable resolution is in everyone's best interest because it reduces the likelihood for the need for future legal services and leaves both parties better equipped for their futures, including a better ability to co-parent children and to productively resolve future disputes. Achieving such a durable outcome requires negotiations with a high degree of integrity and good faith, with full disclosure of all information, and complete consideration of all concerns.

Resolving disputes means that disputes need to be identified and discussed from a place where the discussion can be productive. Properly practiced, Collaborative Law does not sidestep known issues or disputes. When issues and disputes are not addressed, they also are generally not resolved. A key skill of Collaborative Law practitioners is to help parties discover their highest interests, priorities and goals, and to use those interests, priorities, and goals as a guiding light towards resolution. Those interests, priorities, and goals are discussed in a safe and respectful environment with full transparency of the facts.

To arrive at a truly durable and long-term solution, everyone's priorities and goals need to be openly, yet safely, considered and discussed. Therefore, a Collaborative Divorce lawyer will not make arguments for you in the traditional manner, but will instead advocate for you differently. The lawyers help guide the parties to a mutually satisfying outcome; instead of attempting to make arguments to “win” at the expense of one party, the lawyer helps ensure that both parties’ needs are truly met so that the agreement can be durable.

Collaborative Divorce cases involve a series of face-to-face meetings that are facilitated by the attorneys. The initial steps involve starting the process, identifying each person's interests and goals, exchanging necessary information, and learning about each individual's and children's future needs and concerns. After receiving appropriate legal, tax, and other information necessary to make fully informed decisions, the parties brainstorm options and co-create their resolution.

Attorneys seeking to practice Collaborative Law therefore need to learn the necessary protocols and skills so they can effectively participate in the Collaborative Law process, productively facilitate difficult conversations, and provide the necessary structure. The required skills are in addition to solid skills and knowledge of substantive and procedural law; similarly, the skills do not replace skills and knowledge of substantive and procedural law. Both are required for competence. To work effectively in this model, lawyers need to learn how to productively confront rather than avoid conflict, need to learn how to deploy interventions that allow the parties to productively discuss the issues that cause conflict, and need to build a structure to allow the parties to reach agreement.

In order to provide a fully supported environment that is conducive to productive discussions, a Collaborative Divorce professional team is typically recommended. (Our office works almost exclusively in an integrated team model.) The team usually consists of a financial specialist, one or two divorce/communications coach(es) (we believe that it is preferable and more cost-effective to have two coaches), and a child specialist. The purpose of the team is to provide the highest level of service in the most cost-effective manner. The professional with the most applicable area of expertise provides services within that professional's expertise. In addition to significant substantive background in their areas, team members also need to be trained in Collaborative Divorce and mediation. By working together as a cohesive team, the value provided to the clients can be greater than the sum of the parts.

The financial specialist compiles and analyzes financial information, and helps educate the clients and attorneys about the unique financial circumstances of the case. The financial specialist assists in preparing budgets, and sometimes projections, to ensure that present and future financial needs can be considered, and helps identify tax considerations to allow careful planning. The financial specialist helps avoid unnecessary differences that can result when two attorneys, who are likely far less skilled in financial matters than a specialist, separately do the same work. In a Collaborative Divorce, the attorneys review the source documents and the work of the financial specialist to flag for legal issues, while leaving the heavy lifting to the professional best equipped for that part.

The divorce/communications coach(es) assist(s) parties with communications to ensure that their face-to-face joint sessions are as productive as possible. The coach also helps the rest of the team identify communication patterns, to allow for more effective interventions to keep the process as productive as possible. Coaching is time-limited (usually 3-5 sessions), and focused on helping the legal process. Local practice and the circumstances of your unique case will dictate whether a joint coach or individual coaches are recommended. Because coaching is not confidential as to the legal/financial team, is inherently inconsistent with therapy, and to ensure the continued availability for coaching in the future, a coach cannot also act as a therapist on a case.

The child specialist educates parents about child development and arrangements that work best for children in divorce. If appropriate, the child specialist will interview the children to bring the "voice" of the child to the parenting plan discussion. The final parenting plan is created by the parents with the support of the child specialist and the attorneys, to ensure that it is optimal for the children and parents.

The divorce lawyers are in charge of the divorce negotiations and the legal aspects.

All team members work together in a cohesive manner to provide the best possible support for clients, and the highest quality of service.

Collaborative Divorce proceedings are confidential, to ensure that all options can be safely considered and discussed.

Other Information:

Please email us or visit our website for additional information.