Mediation's Hidden Benefits

The most talked about benefit of mediation lies in its cost effectiveness. Having both spouses together in one room dealing directly with issues under the guidance of a skilled facilitator is, as they say, "priceless."

Yet saving money is only a minor benefit of mediation. The "real" benefits of mediation lie in the process itself. The face-to-face structure of mediation not only saves time, but also provides a method for dealing with the "details" of an agreement as well as its major components. A skillful mediator keeps a couple focused and on task.

Mediation is solution-based and results oriented; the process, in and of itself, is a problem-solving approach with separation as the major question to be answered.

Child Support and Custody

Mediation is particularly helpful for couples with children. While the roles of husband and wife are over, "Mom and Dad" remain lifelong partners. A comprehensive agreement, crafted through mediation, is an invaluable tool for families now and in the future.

• Learning how to deal with the unanticipated (sudden illness, accidents, etc.)
• Anticipating the "small and major" future events with respect to children (teacher conferences, doctors' visits, school vacations, family functions, remarriage, dating, cohabitation)
• Learning how to negotiate with each other during crises
• Learning how to present a united front in order for children to feel safe and protected
• Making choices about children’s elementary and post-secondary education

Financial Education

Frequently in a marriage the business of managing the home and the finances is divided between the couple. Once a couple is separated or divorced, each spouse must learn and understand how to do things they’ve never done in the past.

• Understanding how money has been spent during the course of the marriage
• Learning how to manage assets & plan for the future
• Learning how to establish individual budgets

Interpersonal Skills

Some spouses may feel they are inadequate as communicators. A skilled mediator provides a safe and neutral environment in which couples learn how to communicate effectively with each other.

• Learning how to compromise
• Learning collaborative problem solving
• Learning how to negotiate & bring disputes to resolution
• Feeling empowered by the success of the mediation process

What are mediation's hidden benefits?

A former client put it this way, "Mediation pushed us both to focus on our own practical, day-to-day needs, and to think through what we wanted for our new, separate lives...Our mediator helped us to put the past in the past and helped me feel safe enough to say what I wanted for the future. We both agreed that mediation helped us to move forward as separate individuals who acknowledged and appreciated their history together, but could still be optimistic about tomorrow."