A trial separation before divorce may be a way to cool down and think things through or more accurately, it may be a way to psychologically terminate the marriage and all but guarantee the eventual divorce in fact; depends on your point of view, depends on whether or not you want to fight for the relationship or simply cut and run.
Deciding to Separate from your Spouse
Once you and your spouse decide to separate you will get a chance to experience the joys of divorced life on location. You will begin to try to support two homes on the same paychecks you previously used to support one, pay all sorts of new and different expenses such as psychological counseling for upset children and grieving spouses and come to know the fun of having the children live in both new homes while leaving important school supplies always at the one where they are not currently staying. Experience the loneliness of living and eating alone while the rest of your family spending time at the other spouse’s new home and face the reality of the mirror in trying to find yourself a new partner.
Mediation
Becoming involved in court sponsored or private mediation of the pre-divorce or separation situation can help couples to begin the early divorce processes by defining future personal goals, determining choices that will be made concerning spousal and child support and child custody issues through sessions with a trained divorce mediator. Sometimes couples may want to have marital counseling during a separation period with the vague hope that they may reconcile at some future date, a dream that almost never materializes.
Reconciliation after Trial Separation
Once the marriage has begun to breakdown separating all be guarantees the occurrence of the final split. Reconciliations after trial separations are very rare and usually short lived at best. It happens but only if the spouses have truly grown and changed but that is truly rare. A healthy marital relationship typically comes from staying put and working it out whatever it is. And yes, it really is that simple.
Getting Legal Help
If you or a member of your family is interested in dissolving a marital relationship it would be helpful to discuss the circumstances of the trial separation before divorce with a divorce attorney. During the trial separation period there are many things that a lawyer can do to provide important divorce guidance and protect the rights of the spouses and marital children in anticipation of the decision to file for a divorce.
