Divorce: A Lifetime of Financial Consequences

Many women, including me, often find it very difficult to stand up for themselves when in adversarial relationships with men. I was the first child of a beautiful teenage bride and a cocky 21-year-old Air Force fighter pilot.

They say your personality is pretty much molded by the age of four. If you asked me as a child to describe my mother and father based on my experiences, I would have told you that Mother was sweet and did what her husband asked of her, and if she disagreed, she suffered in silence. Father, on the other hand, was smarter than Mother, made all the important family decisions, and had an important job.

My parents were divorced when I was five years old. I am now 53 years old and I will tell you that I have struggled for years with the emotional hangover of these past role models.

Unfortunately, many women in my age group either think about or actively seek advice about divorce. It is my contention that, as a result of the hobbling effects of past traditional role models, we often do not pursue the fair and equitable division of property that we deserve.

Fortunately, there are now resources available, in the form of legal and financial professionals, who work together to provide you with a divorce safety net. I call this network of professionals “Cooperative Divorce Planners”. Our members include licensed divorce counselors and mediators, licensed family therapists, family law attorneys, and certified divorce financial analysts.

Kate Halvorsen, a family law attorney in Sarasota, Florida, described the desired goal of this professional network in the following statement:

“A group of Sarasota/Manatee County attorneys are available to provide an atmosphere where the Parties are able to resolve all issues outside of the courtroom. The financial and emotional toll that occurs with a lengthy trial process stays with a family forever. Learning to reach resolution on family matters is a credit to the participants – and hopefully a mediated approach is in place for all future matters that arise.”

The primary role of a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst is to help you avoid the heartache of sometimes unintended, but permanent, financial consequences of the division of your property. The division of marital assets requires the insight, intelligence, and experience of a career financial professional who has obtained additional divorce analyst training.

If you seek the advice of a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, you need to make sure that you discuss all of your concerns and present them with all the facts so that you work together to obtain a more equitable divorce settlement.