Do my children choose where they live after divorce?
No. Judges do not base custody solely on a pre-teen's stated preference. We pay more attention to teenagers, but adults make the final decision.
What standard does the judge take into account?
The overriding principle is the "best interest of the child(ren).
How is the "best interest" decided?
Depending on the age of the child, such factors include scheduling, consistency of care, time commitment, keeping appointments, e.g., pediatrician, safety, environment, etc.
Is the mother more likely to get custody?
Generally yes, especially when small children are involved. However, there are many exceptions, especially if the mother is unfit.
What about with older kids, say teenagers?
The father has a much better chance, especially with teenage boys. Many judges believe that a full time father is necessary to maintain discipline with teenagers.
How does shared custody work?
Instead of Parenting Time, the child lives with both parents, usually equally.
If both parents share custody, does that mean no one pays child support?
No. If one parent has a higher income, expect a transfer of some funds to the other parent. The support, however, should be lower than an order determined by the child support guidelines.
Can I stop my spouse from seeing the children if I don't get my child support payments?
No, not without a court order. File a contempt action to collect child support.
Can I stop paying child support if my spouse won't let me see the children?
No.
File a contempt action to enforce your visitation rights.
My spouse has a lover. Can I get the court to stop my spouse from visiting the children in the presence of the lover?
Sometimes courts restrict the presence of a lover until a divorce is final. After a suitable period of adjustment, most courts lift the restriction.
My spouse physically abused me during marriage. Should I be worried about the children having unsupervised visitation?
Some experts believe a person who abuses a spouse may abuse the children. Generally, courts require some evidence that unsupervised visitation goes against the children's best interests.
What's the difference between joint legal custody and sole legal custody?
Joint legal custody confers authority on both parents to make major decisions about the children. It does not mean the children spend half the year with Dad and the other half with Mom. Sole legal custody means that one parent makes all of the big decisions.
