You may have told your spouse you wanted a divorce. You may have been convinced that moving on with your life was great and that you wanted out of the marriage yesterday. However, when it comes time to actually divide up your stuff, make a plan to share your kids, and stand up in front of a court and declare that you are no longer a couple, you may have very serious second thoughts about your decision. If you are at the point when you have realized that divorce would be a drastic mistake, when can you stop divorce? Is it too late?
When Can You Stop Divorce?
In reality, when you can stop divorce is up to you and your spouse. Provided you haven't actually had the divorce decree approved by the court, it is possible to withdraw your petition for divorce, end the litigation or mediation or settlement talks, and go home and be a family again. In fact, some might argue that it is never ever too late- even if the divorce has been finalized and the judge has signed off and you've been living apart, you can always get back together with your spouse and even get remarried if you want to.
Before you stop divorce though, it is important to think about exactly why you are stopping the process. Consider:
- Am I stopping divorce because I am afraid? Some people become fearful at the prospect of being single again and decide they can't go through with the divorce. Fear of being on your own is usually not a reason to stay in an unhappy marriage, and if you were miserable enough to consider getting divorced, getting back together on the basis of fear alone is unlikely to suddenly turn your marriage into a happy honeymoon.
- Are we both willing to change to rebuild the marriage? You may have hurt the other person, or been hurt, a lot in the time leading up to the divorce. The divorce process and the very act of declaring you wanted a divorce probably did further damage to your marriage. If yo are going to stop divorce, you both have to be committed to forgiving each other and taking drastic steps- usually involving counseling- to get back on track.
Getting Help
If you are thinking about the process of stopping divorce, consult with your divorce attorney to find out what you must do to stop the legal wheels that you have put in motion. He can assist you in speaking to the court to get the case dismissed and in understanding any legal ramifications of stopping the divorce process.
